First Visit to the Gwangju Orphanage

"The glory of friendship is not the outstretched hand, nor the kindly smile, nor the joy of companionship; it is the spiritual inspiration that comes to one when they discover that someone else believes in them and is willing to trust them with their friendship." ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Steve and Aneta
Since I have been in Korea, I have met some really incredible people including my good friends, Steve and Aneta. Steve is from Scotland and Aneta is from Poland. They are married and have traveled all over for several years now teaching. It is amazing to hear their stories. They both have been inspiring for me, and now, I have even more admiration for them since they've introduced me to the girl's orphanage in downtown Gwangju, which they both visit and fund raise for.

Today, Steve picked me up at my house with his scooter and we adventurously skidded downtown! (It is amazing what motorbikes can get away with! Stop lights are only precautions for most vehicles and aren't taken seriously. There are no laws that inhibit bikes from zooming in and out of traffic. By bus it usually takes an hour to get downtown from my dong, but by bike, it took us only twenty minutes! Wow!) Ha. Anyways...

The residential home we went to houses over seventy girls from toddlers to teenagers. Most of them were abandoned. In South Korea, single mothers have an incredibly difficult time, similar to America several decades ago. Not only does the government not have nominal financial support for this circumstance, but as a whole, society tends to reject single mothers. The attitude is changing as a women's movement is taking place and jobs are becoming more and more available for women, but it is taking time.

In Korean families, sons have been given more privileges than their daughters. Korea, at one time, was one of the most patriarchal countries in Asia. Once ultra sounds came into use the gender gap widened to its peaking point of 116.6 boys to 100 girls in 1990 (in 2005, China had 120 boys to 100 girls).

South Korea has one of the strongest cultural connections to the Confucian religion in the world, therefore men and women have enormous pressures and responsibilities of looking after their family, parents, and grandparents. Often times wives are responsible for taking care of their parents-in-law. I have heard that it can be very difficult with the pressures of pleasing mother-in-laws with cooking and taking care of their sons. My neighbor, Mr. Hwang even told me that most married couples spend National holidays at the husband's parent's house. During Chuseok, I met Mr. Hwang's only brother, but none of his five sisters came to his parent's house.

Although gender roles are changing, today, most Korean women go to University, but they tend to have a lot harder time finding jobs and the pay role is a lot lower in comparison to their male counterparts. Sometimes, married women are told that certain positions would be too strenuous for them and I've heard that women are encouraged to quit their jobs once they become pregnant instead of just taking leave. I feel bad bringing up all these negatives, because of how much I love it here, but it has added challenges to the family dynamic. It is hard to relate being an independent western woman in these situations. Being present at the orphanage was a really meaningful experience.

It was fun spending time with the girls at the orphanage. Normally there is a hour window on Saturdays where people can come visit. A foreigner started this program and now many foreigners visit every week. Today, we made cards. I was impressed by the English vocabulary of many of these girls. They all knew the names of colors, numbers, parts of the body, and could answer simple questions. One girl asked me to help her translate her friend's names from Korean characters into English letters. It was a lot of fun!

Some of the girls are learning to play the piano. I listened to one gal as she site read, I was impressed! The employees are trying their best to help the girls emotionally, but it has to be extremely difficult. Even today, during the hour visit some of the girls had meltdowns. The longing for attention was obvious. A few girls would come sit on my lap, grab my hand, or play with my hair so nonchalantly. Others would just sit next to me and stare with intrigued eyes. The hour felt like fifteen minutes and before I knew it, it was time for us to leave. Volunteering is an interesting concept, because although its giving one's time to help a cause, being involved in the cause changes a person. Love and compassion was written across all the volunteer's faces as we left the building. Those beautiful girls have left a mark on all our hearts and I look forward to visiting again next week!